The Surprise Gifts

Ive no idea who, but it must be some who hates me alot. Well, somebody edited both my Friendster accounts, by saying that im gay and im dating guys and i need sex. Whoeva it is, i think its really smart how u got into my account, or maybe im stupid enough to have left it signed in in NAFA. So, its either someone from NAFA, which i believe so, or somebody that hacked into it. I dun care who it is, but i just wanna say that i admire that person very much. I can think of anyone in NAFA who hates me that much... because im certainly quite fine with many, only for a few... who are quite capable of doing lame things like that. Well, i changed my password just in case. By the way, if ur the one who did it, thanks! I dun think u might know why... so, nevermind!

Its been quite a few days since school ended for me. I know, tomorrow will be SiHan and YongRui's last day of school, because they'll be having their exams. I can understand the stress, the pain and the torturing anticipation. I went through that, and finally that its over... im quite satisfied, though not as good as i thought it'll be. If its as good as how bad it is, thats kind enough.

Today, i headed down to school to collect my $20 from the finance department in the first campus. To collect the $20, ive to even let them photocopy my student pass. All that arduous crap for that 2 pieces of red paper? I cant believe it... After collecting it, i headed down to Chinatown for lunch with my uncle. We ate alot, actually... i ate alot. It was so difficult to find an empty slot, so Mom had to keep waiting at the carpark, while uncle and i ordered food first. It was a great meal, and i couldnt contact MiYan. Its kinda on the way back to NAFA if i were to collect my trophy from her at NAC. She told me that she'll pass it to me on Sunday when i go for CSCO. Thanks MiYan!

There were many familiar faces in NAFA today. YouGuo played the Pipa for Dedric's recital, and many others. QingLun then told me that he has a gift for me. I was kinda doubtful, thinking that it might be another prank... so, i followed him to his locker. He looked so happy, as he brought me into a studio for me to open up my gift. Its... a SpongebobSquarepants boxers! And a SpongebobSquarepants face shirt! I was so happy! Its like my first gift! Nobody gave me anything... or at least anything special for any of my birthdays any year. All i got was some money, probably some treats and nothing else... Honestly, i cant think of any birthday presents at all. Its not my birthday, not my death anniversay and not any of my grandchildren's birthday... but why did QingLun give me a present out of a sudden? It remains a mystery for all...

I took the boxers and covered my face with it, while too happy for anybody to see that has never been so happy kinda face. Thanks so much! And he told me that his girlfriend picked it for me. So thankful! I love u guys! U know what? Im wearing them now as i blog! Honestly, the shirt is kinda tight. Its a middle size, and honestly... if u dunno, im a person who wears middle size... its just that im fat and ive a tummy. My shoulder length fits only middle and not large, except for some cuttings. Actually it fluctuates around large and middle... but many of my shirts are usually large, because of my evergrowing body during the holidays.

So, after they rehearsed, its Andy's turn to rehearse. I tuned my Pipa and QingLun was laughing about his instrument. He's playing the BanGu, or actually... just the woodblock because they cant get a BanGu. So, its kinda funny... because he doesnt really know how to play it. During the last section, he'll just keep in time and knock at every crotchet. Its kinda funny, because he'll close his eyes and focus... and its funny. Well, after running through about 3 times, we took a rest and went down to catch Dedric's recital. It was TingTing's first, then i brought PeiQian backstage to look for Dedric. She was sitting at the foyer, waiting to enter the hall. Well, there wasnt a single audience except for DrGoh during Dedric's recital. PeiQian and i sat together and enjoyed the whole performance. I had to even help him record his recital. I didnt know what to do, so i just pressed record and left it on the stairs... it even recorded our conversation.

The recital was fine, some parts were messy, but other than that, i think Dedric played really well. I enjoyed the first performance the most, while the second one was kinda boring for me... because i heard that for like a million times already. The last piece was a modern concerto for the Suona, with the Piano accompaniment. It sounded raw to my ears. I dun really like the piece, because its kinda too plain. After his recital, i moved backstage to prepare myself for Andy's recital.

He was really stressed out when he, or the Pianist, played wrongly. During his first piece, he even stopped and apologised, starting again somewhere from the allegro section. We were kinda shocked, but well... it happens. We took our seats and started playing with Andy's cue during the second piece. It was great, and i felt kinda good on stage. I hoped that i felt this good when i was having my own exam... Well, the last section was still kinda wierd... but too bad QingLun doesnt wanna play the rhythm thingi to cue us in. Its not his major anyway, so... cant blame him, he did his best with the bells already anyway.

I stayed back and watched DongXiao's recital too. It was kinda interesting when she changed for the final piece, which she played standing up. Its not really a modern piece, but she dressed like those girls on stage, playing their ErHus by standing up. She moved quite alot too! I must say that its kinda glistening to my eyes. Glistening as in fresh and new. Well, goodjob! After she played, we all left for JunRu's place.

They headed to Bishan first to get the food, while QingLun and i went for soya, then took bus 166 towards AngMoKio to meet them. Before that, i wished Christoven all the best for his exams, which took place after i left. We were talking in the bus, and he mentioned about his misunderstandings with some of his schoolmates and stuff. Well, its surprisingly small how the world is. I think everybody and everyone is linked somehow through a third or fourth party. Singapore is indeed a small world. Anyway, we talked about love too. Its kinda strange how things work.

When we're there, we met up with ShuMin and gang. They all left first, while i waited with QingLun for his girlfriend, i dun think i'll mention who. I brought him to AMKHub, and it was my first time there today! I didnt get to shop... but i brought him to the bank to drop his cheque. After that, he treated me to an ice-cream. Thanks alot again. Soon, his girlfriend came and we all took bus 265 to JunRu's place.

We entered the wrong condo, because its kinda wierd... but we saw this really cute cat there! It was so pretty! I love it! I wanna go bring it home! So, we walked down to another condo and met up with ShuMin who brought us in. They were all cooking already, while MinHui was melting the chocolate chips for the fondue. Its so pretty. I ate many sausages, thats all i remember. I even burp sausages now. Well, they were all busy cooking, and i know its impossible for me to cook, i'll burn everything. So, they kept calling me to do something. I tried, but theres really nothing for me to do. Back then at Sentosa, i did nothing but went to get huge rolls of toiletpapers and went hunting for firestarters, thats all! I did nothing much. I cant cook, so i marinated the chicken wings and ate them too! I steeped all of the chicken wings into the black pepper sauce, and also removed all of the blood clots the way Samuel taught me to a long time ago. Well, had fun there anyway. I had fun at JunRu's place too. Some went to play basketball, while i sat there without moving, enjoying the chatting and the huge variety of sausages.

ShuMin and Dedric couldnt stop cracking lame jokes. I couldnt stop laughing, and well... QingLun's girlfriend was cooking all the time, poor girl. Well, we made her sit down and eat too. Ate alot, and after getting kinda all warmed up, sweating and feeling sticky all over, we took the chairs out and started playing card games.

We first played the shouting game, then some stupid murdering games. Had a load of funny people around, thus had a hell load of fun too! Its the end of their recitals, and everybody is happy as fuck! Im sorry, but yes... we're all very happy! Except for 2 people who hasnt got their exam yet, and its tomorrow anyway. Its Richard and Sebestian the only Percussionists around, and yes... one more. Anyway, it was fun!

Had a hard time deciding where to go after clearing up at 10pm. We took a cab down to the McDonalds that i recommended. Its new, and its my first time there tonight. We took a seat and DongXiao bought a drink, while TingTing bought an ice-cream. ShuMin collected $16 each for the BBQ, and i was really tired by then already. My eyes were like red, but ShuMin was ablazed. She was red all over. I suggested that they can go climb the hill behind the McDonalds. I brought Jasmine and ChaiXia there once i think... they were tricked by me, while they climb that mountain to just get to XiuHua's house. Anyway, they were kinda enthusiastic... but soon, everybody decided to go to DongXiao's house. Very soon, we all took the cab home. Im not sure where the others go, but Dedric and Anthea brought me home first. Thanks to Dedric again and again.

And today, the highest thanks goes to QingLun! I love the boxers! And the shirt! Till now, im still thinking... who might be the one who edited my Friendster profile.

The Lost Chapter Of Life

Sometimes, i do look around. I look around to find everybody indulged in their own problems. Theres actually nobody for me to really turn to. I know, u might think that ive so many friends... but why cant i just speak out to all of them. Well, theres too much to understand... and seriously, its a brain killing topic. Even now, im so bored and tired of mentioning about it.

U know, sometimes... i can only just dream. Im not someone who can live with reality. The harsh and rising tides of criticism just splashes on my shore, wearing me off. Most of the time, they just splash directly on my face. Well, reality. Who can i blame, only for myself to take the pain inside me, which poisons my mind.

Well, i had my exams last Friday. I cant find any word to describe it... only that its not even as bad as my best performance. My nails came loose, and i wonder... why must there be always something, some problems or some bad condition, to destroy my peace on stage. Well, i was sweating like a pig, and i was too busy playing that ive no time at all to wipe it off. I thought, maybe thats how stages are like... so, ive to deal with it. In reality, nobody cares what happens on stage, they'll only wanna hear music from u. As for me, ive so many of these problems... even technical issues of my own music making. I think im really a failure. A failure... in many things. Many.

Mom came home before Friday, and on she fetched me to YanYu's house. There, i had my last lesson before my exam. My hands were still kinda sleeping, so i warmed up and played through the pieces for her. It turned out well, merely some usual mistakes and some movement problems. I packed up and left for the road to exile... hoping that it'll turn bright at the other end.

On the way for lunch, Mom and i quarrelled badly... thanks to uncle's insensitive question which agitated me. I was yelling in the car, and i couldnt think straight. I spurted some very insensitive statement which made Mom cry. She started shouting and crying, while driving towards home. Uncle's intention didnt meant for things to happen this way, thus he sat quietly and started feeling rather guilty. Well, i made it such a big issue because i wanna let them all know that im serious towards such gibberish talks. I dun want any of these to happen again. I thought that after winning the competition, mindsets would change. But apparently, they grew out of the box for the moment and was shut back into their little pea box. I dunno why, but its impossible to make them realise some things. Moreover, i started comparing with others, which made Mom very unhappy. My main punch wasnt with the comparisons, but its the fact that they dunno how others are like, and how the outside world of my circle is like. Come on, sometimes i hear statements that are utmost insulting towards my interest, my passion for music and for the Pipa. I feel so angry but theres nothing i can do, but to keep my cool and turn myself bluntly sarcastic. Mom scolded me for not being able to take a joke. I replied with a freezing hurting statement. Its not a joke anymore, its vilifying and hurting me. Its not a joke at all, it has been said for too long. Ive closed an eye for long enough, its time i leer towards their direction and to mock at them. Come on, im doing something with my bare hands. Im stepping on the ground more than others are. I know, i dream. Im a dreamer, and ive never wanted to live a life enslaved to the feet of any authority or government body. I dun want to make dirty money like conmen and illegal dealers. I dun feel any pride in what i do. Imagine, ive been pressed till ive totally lost my faith in things that i love. Sometimes, when certain questions are thrown at me, i blush and really dunno how to avoid feeling lost about my answers. I really dunno if im doing the right thing. I think, im just foolish. Mom's tears made me realise that ive carried it too far. But i wanna bring my point across hard and strong like stones on fire, which hits hard on falling towers. This time, my line is drawn clear.

Mom couldnt take it, she drove home and alighted... and asked my uncle to eat alone. I asked him to fetch me to school, and i insisted that i go school and not have lunch. My appetite was lost, and to think that im going to have my exams in such an emotionally unstable state... im really devasted. I almost lost it and wanted to just take a bus somewhere and skip my exams. To think of it, since Mom has supported me so far financially, unlike my dead father, ive to just do it for once. After that, if this fissure will never seal, im going to just destroy myself by doing what others want me to. I'll blot out my dream of a musician and become a nurse. I know, u might find it funny. However, this joke of becoming a nurse is a serious thing for me. Im going to be a nurse. So, i'll tell myself everynight before i sleep, with a dropping tear and some heart breaking prayers, i'll tell myself, i'll tell myself that i wanna be a nurse, a good nurse, to do everybody proud. Be happy for me.

So, after the fight, on the following day, Mom and i pretended that nothing happened. We talked like normal, only to find ourselves awkwardly talking to each other and caring for each other more. Well, my heart aches so, with a tormented soul, so vilified by jokes which sounded like a screech to my ears. Now, with love sheltering over, i feel like a baby, safe in the arms of Mom. Theres nothing i would do to hurt u, Mom. I wont say anything like that ever again to break ur heart. Well, everytime i dream of my Mom's funeral, i'll wake up crying. Trust me, i have many dreams of her dying or sacrificing for me in some way or another. I'll wake in a violent jerk and just flush my cheeks with tears. To think of it, its quite sudden that my Dad just passed on like that. I remembered cursing him when i was young, and Mom told me that by the age of 18, i'll be able to decide whether to see him anymore or not. Well, it seems that i dun have a choice, at the age of 18 he died to dark phantom who took many lives away, cancer. If Mom goes, i'll have nobody left in this world. My aunties and uncles from my maternal family are all useless. They rely on my Mom to take care of their mother, my grandma. They owe my Mom so much money, and some even seek shelter in her own home. They've dumped their kids under the care of my Mom, an unemployed single woman. She told me that she fears that once their kids grow up, they'll forget about her. She fed them, and hopes that they'll remember her and take care of her next time. She's always worried that i'll side my father while she's always the one sheltering me and watering me till i grow. Its hurting to see her cry... and i dun think i can take another blow like this. In another words, im sorry for stubbornly highlighting my statements.

Im 90% sure that such things wont happen again. Well, 2 years ago, such an event took place. It was the journey home from Sentosa. I skipped my prelims, i bet many of u might find this familiar, but... do u know why? Or, what really happened? Many things happened, and i had fun at Sentosa, only to find Mom and i crying while she fetched me home from Sentosa. She came looking for me, because i was really unstable. I grew up in a emotionally depressing home. When i was young, my father never cared for me. Mom would come home with me running to her arms, and she would then question Dad about my crying. I remembered one night, i was awakened by Mom, and she dragged me out of the house with a luggage. I was carrying my blue coloured smelly teddy bear, while with my thumb in my mouth. I was really confused, i didnt know what was happening... and well, i asked Mom... where are we going? Will we come back again? As far i remember, i never stepped into that house anymore.

Mom filed a divorce with Dad, and i was kept with Mom at grandma's place at AngMoKio. We left Hougang for good, and never to return that dreadful place ever again. I was kept away from all this legal issues. Mom won custody over me for a huge sum of money, and giving away the house and many of her assets. Dad wanted materials over me. After learning about this only a few years ago, i was disappointed and i was really down for a long period. I found my father a disgusting person, but i told myself that he might have changed... for that i can see that he loves me so. I was wrong, though his love might be unfailing, his love for Jane dominates over this thoughts and his decisions for he he entrusted everything to Jane, who took all his money and threw his adopted daughter, Amanda, out of the house. She wanted to send her to China illegally, but was unsuccessful to her surprise that Amanda went against her and filed a case with some organisation who takes care of her now in a juvenile home. As for me, im left with nothing but just useless photos of Dad which means alot to me. These memories are priceless, but... whats the worth? How isit worthy of my love? Dad is a huge disappointment. Honestly, ive no feelings for him anymore. I love him, but ive enough reasons to hate him.

I know, ive repeated this story for long enough. However, theres another part which nobody has heard before. Why do i hate fruits? Why do i hate balls? Why do i not like people who stands on my left side? Why do i only draw people facing the left? Why do i not drink coffee nor tea? Theres many stories... i think i can publish many different issues.

Well, enough of the happy stories of life. Today, i went to Jasmine's place for a visit. ChaiXia and i met before we took the lift up. I sat at the living room, while ChaiXia started practicing her XiaoRuan. Then, something horrible happened, which was kinda sweet actually. I was so tired of listening to music already... after my exams, i think i need a long break from the instruments. So, she was practicing then she accidentally used too much strength, which resulted in the breaking of one fret at the higher register. The fret dropped out, and i was laughing... I have a glue to fix it, but i dunno how to pass to her. We watched Turandot, and they enjoyed it.

After that, we played MahJong with Jasmine's Mom. She kept saying that im fat. I feel so... happy. Honesty is the best policy right? Anyway, it was fun... i won so many times! So many times! Its my blog, i say anything i want! I can even lie... But, honestly, i won so many times. ChaiXia and Jasmine must be so jealous...

Well, im tired and thats enough for the day. Tomorrow, i'll have the whole day dedicated to Andy's recital and the BBQ at JunRu's place. So, peace.

Trepidation

U might wonder if this blog is effete. Well, im here again to prove it wrong. Its back for more, but this will be just one post before this coming Friday, the official comeback. Ive been terribly busy playing games. No! Ive been terribly busy practicing the Pipa. I hope im right...

Many events took place over these few days, almost a week, or probably more than a week. Those events took flight and now are shot down into my ocean, like broken pieces of wood floating on my sea of thoughts. I need to pick these pieces up and make something out of it, before it ruins the empyrean serenity of the ocean. So, actually im just here to blog... to get things out of my mind. I want back the limpid view of my life.

In short, ive to say that the performances at NAFA were alright, just enough to save my little life. And other than that, last Sunday, i had to rehearse early in the morning at NUS for the concert which is in the afternoon. I havent practiced much with them, and on Saturday night, Jasmine and SiHui came to watch my performance at NAFA. Which after, we were caught in a human jam of taxi snatching. It took us long enough to get a cab, from NAFA all the way till Bugis. Finally, after catching one, we headed out to PasirRis, where the TPCO chalet was held.

Had fun there, mostly laughing with JingTing and making jokes out of MeiHong. We laughed till it hurts. I think JingTing is one of the people who can successfully make me laugh without doing much. Another would be Audrey, and of course... Anthea too at times. While they were out doing some night walk, i slept in the room and chatted with JingTing and gang. They woke me up in time, and we all walked out of the chalet early in the morning and took a cab home.

JingTing stays near me, so i dropped her nearby and headed home. Took a shower, and headed out for NUSCO rehearsal almost immediately. At UCC, the concert hall, i took out my Pipa and started warming up. The backstage was horrible, its like Esplanade, but far worse... because of the many passages and wierd shaping of the passage routes. We ran through the pieces, and surprisingly, the concert was great! I personally think that the ErHu concerto by LumYanSeng was the best. Its so much better than rehearsals, and honestly, im really surprised. The Pipa concerto was alright, just that i dun really like the Chinese orchestra's rendition. During the interval, i headed out and chatted with MrYeo and others. I saw Jeremy, XueQi and gang outside, but didnt talk to them.

After the concert, i rushed out to grab a cab with Kenny. The performers were supposed to stay behind for photo taking and stuff. But well, ive to rush off for another performance at NAFA. Well, not as ive not expected, i played terribly that night. Im too tired, and im not focused at all. I got WenYang's number that night, and i talked to him about some of my plans. I might need him for help next time. He is a very very nice guy. Thanks WenYang.

Stayed back after the performance for a buffet. There, Adams kept praising me and telling me that i did well. Im aware that it was bad, so i told them that it wasnt good... but he said that its really good, as followed by RenePhua and Hartung too. Well, that night... i felt very tired and worn out.

I went back home and took a long nap to refresh myself for the next day.

Nothing much happened during these few days other than the fact that i went shopping... and now waiting for the last and final one this Friday, my practical exam. I got myself some really nice clothings, for a cheap price, and many many French CDs! People, StMusicWorld is having 50% off, and their CDs are priced at $6.50 and above. Its really cheap! I love that place, i went there thrice and found myself buying many French recordings. I bought CDs by ThierryAmiel, the French idol as all might know, and also CDs by LaraFabian and JonatanCerrada. Well... if u guys wanna go there, u can ask me where it is, or actually... its just at ShawTowers.

Christoven got almost knocked down by a van. Fairul got me really mad... and i dun wanna talk about it. Also, ive to thank him for getting work done.

My exam is drawing really near. Im going to school everyday to practice, but only to find myself playing after practicing awhile. I just played LAN with SiHan and YongRui. I few days ago, with YinXuan, Richard, LianWei and others. I dunno... but i think its wrong. Bad, really bad. Just took a cab back with SiHan. He dropped off first and gave me $10 to continue my journey home.

I need to sit back and congitate about life. There are many things which im clearly lacking of, but yet not sure how to get them. Just now, MikeChiang called me, and he told me about some plans. Im glad and very happy. Excited mostly... but still, there are many obstacles to clear before doing so.

Recently, i talked with my friends, and realised that many things are happening, and such fate befalls on people that i least expected them to become such monstrous creatures. I think its not their fault, because its not them anymore. I want the old friend i used to have. Im not sure whether to point the blaming finger on the influence or the influenced. However so, im still a friend, and i wanna help. I could see in his little blinking eye that what i knew of has nonplussed him. There are many things i know too, but just not updated enough. Thanks for the talk, or else i wouldnt know of such existing terror. I think its really important that we have trustworthy friends around. Ive made my guess, and since im right, i should be told about such things. And even though i cant do much to help, i only can lend my listening ear, or even at times, to force my listen ear over. Im always here, and its not all the time that i'll spread things that i hear of, unless its necessary.

XueQi was crying yesterday, and she talked to me. Im glad that she can trust me with her words, and honestly, i think that its important for one to think healthy before doing anything. Therefore, XueQi, u have to try to stop being so depressed. Think slowly, and figure things out slowly. Im sure there are some things that aint a problem at all. Uve walked this far, dun fall and hurt urself again.

Im not taciturn, but just not really open to anybody. I need support at times, and it'll be great if people aint that blunt. Sometimes, i look into the mirror and sigh to myself. I wonder... if people are really saying and meaning things they say. Truth or dare? I would rather dare myself at times than to believe things i hear.

Mom is coming home soon, before Friday, so that she can fetch me for lesson before heading for lunch and then to school for my final exam.

Recently, through the help from friends, i got to find Sophy, Zheng player, to accompany me for my exam. I dun blame TingTing, because she is busy, but she could have told me really much earlier. LimChooLi is busy, and i wouldnt wanna bother her too, because its just my exam, its not like a major performance. So, i found Sophy, who willingly accepted to play for me. Thanks alot. We rehearsed once and it turned out to be alright, the final section still not fast enough. On that day, i'll move one bridge over from another Zheng, because the 2 Zhengs in school are kinda handicapped. She came with her twin sister, Clara, if im not wrong. Well, thanks to them both. And moreover, i asked if i may treat them for dinner, but they rejected. Weird, and really nice, thanks.

I just cant wait to be king. I mean... i just cant wait for my exams to be over. Ive been eating heavily recently, its not surprisingly that im gaining so much weight. After my exam, im going to celebrate wildly! I tell u, im going to drink, eat, sleep, play and shop like crazy!

I should post what people say in MSN to me, because i find it super hilarious at times. By the way, i always win when we play LOTR games. Im so bored of winning! Well, that day, my Saruman destroyed SiHan and Richard. But, i was lucky to have myself a wall surrounding my Isengard. Other than that, Saruman grew strong by killing SiHan's men. Today, i found the one ring and gave birth to Sauron, who destroyed SiHan entirely. YongRui's elves were helpless... and he managed to kill Sauron after it became weak from all his arrows. It took him very long to kill him. My WitchKing was killed many times with his other Nazguls, and the BlackRiders too. Well, its a nice game... actually, im deeply in love with the story of LOTR. A few days ago... i even went to check out of the history of Saruman. The interesting thing is that the writer has magically created a world of his own. Its magical!

Im tired... and i wanna go play my games. Im intending not to sleep tonight, and practice early tomorrow, or probably practice later at night. I need some rest for tomorrow, so im going to wear myself out tonight. Friday is arriving like the arrival of puberty, so fast... and so shocking. Im joking, i bet its not shocking for SiHan, because he is a caveman. He is still going through evolution...

Im so afraid. I think im doing really badly this year. I fear for my final year. I really fear for myself... because there are many things that i dun have. In fact, im the only Pipa player that is going through NAFA first straight after graduating from my Os. YouGuo would be the only Pipa player that has graduated from NAFA, and im next, but i entered at an early age, as compared to YouGuo. So, im afraid that the concept behind the judges would differ much from perspective. Im worried. I know that im not very good, not even good, but i think i can barely just pass through the exams, which im very elated if i do. I wanna just get out of this place quickly... and get into NS. Its the first time im hoping for NS... but of course, to obtain my diploma first. I must get it first... or else, im going to kill myself.

Im afraid, very afraid.

IMVU

So, i didnt blog last night, and im here to blog. Well, yesterday was a tiring day. In the morning, i was late for lesson with YanYu. Well, during the lesson, Angela cried. YanYu hurried to attend to her baby, but only to realise that she's just calling out, not even a single tear. I was laughing away... because its just too cute. We went through the duet piece, and i was still thinking who'll be playing the Zheng for me! TingTing promised, and she thought that im joking, and its regarding my exam, why would i joke? Im kinda pissed that she suddenly dun wanna play for my exam. Well, i cant blame her, because her exam woud be after mine. So, i need a Zheng player! I'll be asking around...

Had lunch with my uncle, Mom and her friends from Malaysia. ShuYing, is the daughter of her friend, and she is my age. But, she looks so much older? Im not sure, but slightly more mature looking. Anyway, she's here to look for her table tennis coach. She is a sports person i guess... As for me, after eating, we brought Mom back home, then uncle fetched us down to Bugis.

They wanted to go OG to look for their friend, so i brought them there, and from there, i walked back to school. I was in the com lab, and thats where i got cheated! Cheated by Jwen and Evan, the horrible bad people! They tricked me into playing this stupid game called IMVU. It serves like MSN, IRC and with graphical designs and an online character, that makes the chat much more interesting. So, i created my avatar and registered. By doing so, they actually get 500 credits and gets extra 50 credits when i get my first chat. Its stupid! They cheated me... and after persuading me to play, and after getting their credits, they leave me alone.

I figured out on how to play, and i realised that they were using me. So, i scolded them and started making fun of them. I kept irritating Jwen by asking her questions about IMVU, while she was doing her history essay. So funny! Then, Jeremiah told me that he has an account too. So, we talked for quite a long time, hoping to earn some credits. Well, we do earn credits by talking for at least 3 minutes a day, and it'll multiply everyday. So, ive no choice but to ask my friends to play it, so that i can earn that 500 credits, and talk to them for an extra 50 credits. Moreover, by logging on everyday to chat to earn my extra credits. I need some credits to get myself something.

After playing, i realised that my character is too ugly. So, i used my other email account to create another character, which looks so much better! I bought a house, a Piano and for the old character, a house too and an ugly Chinese chair. So super ugly! My new house is so much nicer...

By the way, there isnt much to do, so... i played till around 5pm, and headed down to the theatre to check out on the dancers. Its there, during dinner, that i got to know WenYang. He is the accompanist for the dancers in the ballet. He plays the Piano, and he is a very nice and friendly guy. I didnt know about him until i read his resume from the programme booklet. He has been in the field of dance accompaniment for 5 years already. With only 6 years of Piano lessons, he continued to pick up other instruments like Flute and Piccolo in his school bands and stuff. Now, he is currently studying in NUS, and also in the NUSSO. He is the resident conductor of RWinds, an alumni symphonic band of the Raffles school. He is kinda amazing, and really humble.

We talked and joked, while waiting for the dancers to rehearse the ballet one more time. I headed outside and found a reception, where all the lecturers were, talking and eating. DrKan was there, talking to DrErnestLim, RenaPhua and there was DrGoh, Adams, and EricWatson as well. Other than the music faculty, theres many other lecturers from all over. Meanwhile, let me introduce u guys to the head of dance, BerndMichaelTeichmann. From his name, u would probably guess that he's from Germany. He is, and he has been in Singapore since 2001. He is very funny and humorous.

So, i waited backstage, and soon... while chatting with the dance lecturers and WenYang, time flew quickly and the curtains were drew. There were applauses while the first item was presented, Indian dance. After the dances, there was an interval, and i wished WenYang all the best, as he was telling me that he'll get butterflies often for Piano solos. Well, as for me, though ive played solos so many times, im still getting huge butterflies and moths in my stomache. Thats the worst!

He played well, and i sat backstage, waiting for the ballerina to come collect her stocking from me. She has to change her costume, so i had to hold her big bulky dress for her too. Its so funny, because the other girls were all laughing at me. I was nice enough to help her, and i think i'll be helping her for the other 2 performances, tonight and tomorrow night.

Soon, after the short interval, its my turn. I sat there, and the curtains drew back, the lights litted on the dancers. I knew, its my cue, and i had to play the first note. There goes...

It ended, and i was kinda still pumping away... but kinda relaxed surprisingly. As i went backstage, Jamaludin said it was a good job. The dancers did very well! After their final piece, which is a premiere in Singapore, we were invited back on stage, WenYang and i. We bowed, and were given a bouquet each. We walked to the side, and the lecturers were then invited on stage. Grand finale, and thats the end of the concert. The lights went out, and the curtains fell.

We waited for the dancers to have a last briefing, and for them to move out. We shook hands with Michael, Jamaludin and other lecturers. So, our reporting time tomorrow will be later, maybe at reporting time would do. Well, i'll go slightly earlier to prepare myself.

I took the flowers, and headed upstairs to level 6. QingLun saw me, and he read my resume, pointing out silly sentences and laughing at my photo. What great encouragement i have from a good friend. He said that if i were to list out the names of the masters which ive attended masterclasses from, then he would have too many to write. Well, thats ur problem, if u wanna write, u write. If u dun wanna write, then dun laugh at others who do write. By the way, ive seen so many resumes talking about who they've attended masterclasses from. So, its not like every resume must be according to a specific style. Moreover, by doing what u did, ur actually insulting resumes by people like WuYuXia, MikeChiang and YouGuo, because i referred to their's mostly for the resume's structuring. I wasnt angry, but just kinda disgusted how narrow sometimes people can think.

He headed downstairs with me, and i wanted to give him a ride to Bedok, because we're going there. But he refused and he left... Thanks for accompanying me downstairs and opening the door for me while my hands were all busy. Thanks, QingLun.

We left for Bedok, only to find ourselvse stuck in the traffic. We fetched the girls and her friends, and we all headed for supper. Where? At the minced pork noodles market. There, i met LianWei and his friends, including Desmond and his friend, the 2 Clarinetists. Well, ate alot... i ate 2 bowls of noodle, and ate some shellfish, but its kinda spicy... i almost burnt my tongue.

Got home, after fetching the girls home, and lastly... she had to fetch ShuYing and her mother to ChoaChuKang, then she'll head to Malaysia and back for petrol.

I was trying to blog, only to find myself getting lazier and lazier. Its the ideas, they are running dead... So, here i am blogging away... and im going to attend to my avatar on IMVU! I got to encourage people to register the IMVU, and some will be my new target, and i got to ask Dedric, Michelle, MinHui, Richard, Grace and others to register already.

Damn, MinHui has an account already! Damn it! Im joking... im fine.

Evan and Jwen must be so jealous! Coterminious reactions...

Malapropism

I warned others about donkey today. I feel good.

I woke up late, and thanks to SiHan's morning call, which was only half an hour before the exam starts! I had to rush downstairs, without bathing and even changing, just brushing my teeth and washing my face, and im lucky to board onto a cab quickly. Anyway, who would take cab at that time? Its super expensive! When i got to school, i had to pay $16, originally only $11. Thanks to the government for the extra charge for peak periods and stuff. I remembered back then, theres no such thing as ERP. Well, now with that money eating machine, its no wonder the fireworks can last for 5 minutes.

LianWei got there first even though he boarded the cab later than me. Well, we're both late, and we both headed to the computer lab to finish up with our aural work. EricWatson was very kind, he allowed us to take the paper at the later slot. Im so thankful! So, we went on with the composition, if u get what i mean, and even May sat down with us and started composing.

I heard from YinXuan that the rhythmic dictation was easy. When i got my paper, it looked easy for sure. The melodic dictation was played, and while he walked around to check on the aural book, i noticed some people cheating! My goodness! Those China people are really daring. So intrepid, they just stuck out their head and just copied, and could even ask for the answers! LeeTung saw, and we exchanged a wierd face. I even hinted for LianWei to take a look. Well, total ownage man. She's good. Im not going to say who.

During the exam, i was terribly disturbed by the rhythmic dictation. I felt that its impossible for me to catch it, though its the easier. Its all quavers and crotchets, but i just cant get it. The first time he played it, i didnt catch a single ball! Im so going to fail. As for the harmonic dictation, i found it rather simple. Im stupid enough to put an Italian chord, when the answer was just straight in my face that its just a simple minor chord. I didnt know why, i thought so long for an answer... and tried my luck, even though im sure im wrong, that it might be the Italian chord. Im so screwed... Back then, im always around 80 to 90 for my aural, and recently, i checked my scores for the previous test, i got 56. How nice?

The huge gap made me worry much, but theres nothing much to trouble myself with now other than the upcoming concerts as well as the practical exam. Im worried... and shedding tears, thinking about what to do and when to do it. Ive things not done yet, its my history assignments as well as concert attendance portfolio. Ive a feeling that i might need to submit my history assessments as re-assessment. Im so dead.

Didnt eat. I headed home straight. Last night, i was on the phone with SiHan till i finished my aural work, ate supper and slept. LianWei conferenced with us for a few minutes before hanging up. Well, he was bored, and he kept hinting for me to go his house to accompany him. He even said, he's lonely. What the hell! He's joking, but recently... i think SiHan is getting more and more influenced by...

Schubert.

He kept tempting me with food over the phone. Well, i was really so hungry that i had to get a bite downstairs. So, even though i started later than SiHan by 40 pages, i finished the work faster than him! Because, he was busy eating and play games. I didnt skip much, and i tried my best to fill in every page, only leaving out at least 1 question or 2. Sometimes, i even left out 2 entire pages, because its just too hard to copy. I mean, do.

I got home, bathed, changed and used the computer. I took a cab down to school again for the dance rehearsal. I took my Pipa, changed my tape with courtesy of ShuMin, who lent me her tape. Im going to get more tape... In the morning, MrYeo met me and told me about my student, Veltrice. He said that she's playing the Pipa with this wierd and wrong technique. Im sure i thought her the right thing, and during practice, she did it well. However, i think she's still constantly seeking for speed more than accuracy. I think i need to talk to her about such things.

I got to the theatre, and saw them running through their dances. Its kinda interesting, with a wide genre, from ballet to modern Chinese contemporary... and even to Indian dance. I sat in the dark, with my Pipa tuned, and ready myself for the rehearsal. I kept my ring somewhere, and i think i lost it, because i couldnt find it just now. Im kinda disappointed actually... very sad that my ring is gone! Its expensive and its gone like that. Who could possibly have stolen it? I curse that theif that his hand will decompose and rot, till maggots feed on his flesh and flies lay their eggs in that decaying hand. Let that hand fester with pus, scars and infected by flesh-eating bacteria! Let that person die in horror, let his hand cause him to be handicapped, and moreover... let him have no more fingers to wear my ring. Even if he would to have passed it to someone else, his hand will still suffer the curse of my ring, and let whoeva touches it die in horror!

By the way, as i was saying, when its my turn, i headed backstage and the crew gave me a pickup microphone. He taped it to the side of my Pipa, and passed me this heavy thingi which looked like a walkietalkie, and he inserted it into my pocket. Its kinda too loud at first, so loud that with a slight touch, the microphone would magnify and amplify any little sound. Even when i fart, the whole theatre wont smell of it, but it'll sound like thunder.

I played the piece once the light started. Its kinda exciting actually, and with the microphone, i didnt need to stress my sound so much. Im happy enough... Well, ran through the whole piece, and i think i found myself more satisfied with the entire performance this time round. The music and the dancing matches more than before. Im sure the results are clear, but still... i think theres room for improvement on my part.

After rehearsing, i went off to have lunch with Rit, Moses, Michelle and MinHui. We headed to Bugis for lunch, and MinHui wanted to eat at Delifrance, but all of us didnt want to. Next time we'll eat there again, so cheer up! We ate next door, at Yoshinoya. I seldome eat there, and i think the food aint that bad, but still kinda expensive for little servings. The fries was like... merely 4 pieces. I was like... amazed that theres so many! So many!

We sat, and waited for Moses to order. He came, and told me that he doesnt wanna take the vegetable, and he passed me all his vegetable, including onions from his beef rice. Well, thats kinda strange, and its same as QiaoFang! She dun eat vegetables too. I asked if its a habit, and he said that it is. Moreover, he mentioned that he's allergic to sesame seeds. Imagine that! What about burgers? Moses is a very nice person, very open with his life and also with the things he says. I enjoyed talking and listening to him. We sat there, while Rit headed back to school first, and we chatted about his life in Russia. By the way, he'll be entering into the year 2s next academic year. It'll be exciting and more challenging for everybody. He's so pro, and yet he's coming into year 2. Spoil market right? Im joking. Well, we talked about Benedict too. Its good to know that he's changing, because if hes not, then i really pity him.

We talked alot, including things like how he got into MDC and stuff. So, its time for MinHui and Michelle to head back to school for their theory class, as for me, to practice my Pipa for another rehearsal at night. Moses headed off to the MRT station.

While walking back, MinHui was complaining about their theory teacher. Well, bitchy i guess. I mean the teacher. There are such teachers around, and im sure that some MOE teachers will become like that one day. I practiced my Pipa, and Michelle took her Pipa and practiced with me. I taught her some things about the concerto which i played for the competition last year. Well, its kinda fun.

After getting tired, i headed down to the recital hall to listen to the year 1 presentations. Well, i got to watch only Laurel and Terence's group. Laurel's group presentation was good and very interesting. They did it like a radio broadcast. There was Sebestian, Rekkha, Anthea, Richard, Jonathan and of course Laurel himself. I loved their sense of humour, as for the other group, its a video presentation like what ZhengYi did last year. I think its not as good as ZhengYi's, but it has its own interesting features. ShuMin was acting as Bach! My goodness, i broke into tears when i saw her footage.

After the whole presentation, i headed down to the theatre for another run through, but this time i brought ShuMin there. I guess she must have felt disgusted with my performance. Anyway, we did the same thing as before, but this time with our costumes. Im going to wear CSCO's coat, because the white Chinese costume is just too disgusting. Moreover, its not a full colour... because i dun have white bottoms. I mean, pants.

The rehearsal ended, and i headed to the Percussion studio to look for Sebestian and Richard. They were practicing and playing. Before that, i was so bored that i chatted with Jeremy in the toilet. I rolled my chair into the toilet, and sat there... chatting with Jereny, who was shitting! Well, the smell was too much for me to take... therefore, i left for the Percussion studio.

I entered, and i played some chords and showed Sebestian on how to improvise chords. Im not very good at it, but theres a way or 2 for me to figure chords out slowly. And for progressions and modulations, i thought him a few tricks on resolving to the tonic chord. Theres so much to explore on, other than to stick with the normal dominant's perfect cadence.

We played, and after that, we left for soya. Chatted about some animal, and i had dinner there. Soon, we were walking towards Bugis, to Richard's bus-stop, while trying to resolve this topic that Sebestian and Richard are arguing over with. Its about Percussion stuff, and i dun understand much, but i can try to apprehend whats going on.

In the bus, i told Sebestian some things. I adviced him on other things. Sometimes, i preach so much that i dun practice them at all, but its to inspire others as well as to enlighten them with their shadow of doubts. I gave him my advices and my own thinking about music as well as about healthy competition. Well, i hope that he'll think wider. Ur welcome, Sebestian. But remember, sometimes, u have to keep certain things to urself, for a reason as not to be hypocritical, but to be honest with oneself and not blunt.

Im home now. In the bus just now, an Indian lady sat beside me. She has a shoulder of a grown man, fist of a muscular guy, face like a hunk and ordour like just any other. And its obvious that she's a tranny! I was so shocked...

The unintentional humorous misuse of words is a skill which i have. Its also known as malapropism. Bad or not, its for u to figure. But till now, its kinda obvious that its bad at times.

Segue

Slept late, woke up late. Had lunch with my uncle downstairs before he fetches me to school. Well, its my oral exam today. Im quite prepared, but as usual... i screwed it up. Ive watched the opera many times, listening to ever aria, and read every single part of the story. Well, my effort got paid off with a few long pauses, many stuttering and quite a few clear mistakes.

Before entering into the room, SiHan was telling me that he's going to fail his oral exam, because he wasnt allowed to change his topic to talk about. In the end, he has to talk about modernism, which i think would be kinda tough to do it impromptu, because u wouldnt expect the unexpected silence, and the stress... So, he did it, but he wasnt happy with it. During our turn, we all entered together and chose to sit together. I sat beside Fairul, and on my other side, theres LianWei and YinXuan. Other than them, theres LuHeng, YongRui, YanYa, Amy and some who came in later, YuJing, LiuSha and FeiYang.

DrKan wanted somebody who reviewed an opera to start off. We pointed all at Fairul. So, he started off, talking smoothly, but with very complicating points which i dun understand at all. Till now, i dun understand whether the main character is the woman or a guy, but i heard something like a girl likes her or something, so im thinking... isit a lesbian opera? Anyway, i dunno the title, and i really cant picture everything. Well, he didnt stutter much unlike me, but he did have pauses, short ones.

It was my turn, my heart skipped 2 beats, and i started off with the naming of the characters as well as the librettists. DrKan was giving me this face, and i was just pushing myself faster and faster, i had to skip small sections, because 3 minutes is really very short! I started off the opera, with the introduction, and slowly... i felt my lines fading away into blankness. In my mind, those that ive rehearsed and read to myself had gone, and there was nothing left but just a vague memory of the opera. I tried grabbing words, and finding words to express myself, but it all revolved around the same old vocab. I thought, im so dead. I really wanted to just stop there and cry. But well, it has to go on. Sometimes, with a slight mistake in my statement, DrKan would open her eyes really big. Well, i was nervous, especially during the parts which i had to pause to think, because its just too quiet! She told us to tell a story like telling our friends, but... its just not possible when the mood is so intensified. I lost my points... and started stuttering. I scrambled my way through, till the final act, and DrKan interrupted and told me to finish it up. Well, i was getting there, i didnt cut any part of the opera, and continued with my story till the end. The last act is the shortest, because Puccini died and his music stopped then. By the way, the story was completed by someone else... so, if ur curious, i posted the story of 'Turandot', the opera by Puccini, at my previous post, yesterday.

LianWei was next, and he talked about Wagner's opera. Well, the story was slightly more interesting with swords and dragons. I could tell that he was kinda nervous too, with his tongue tied at some places, he was stuck with his ideas, and the wierd names of the dwarf and the dragon. Fairul was laughing somemore... Finally, YinXuan's opera is the best. He chose the famous opera, 'Phantom of the Opera'. Now, how unknown can that be? So, everybody knows about it... and YinXuan used good vocab! Instead of saying, they didnt believe it, he said... they didnt believe the shit. DrKan's reaction was shocked, and we all broke into laughters.

Well, LuHeng's was the best. He spoke with a doctor's voice, and could tell that he is the most intellectual one around. Well, he is a composer! Good excuse right? I admired YuJing's courage, she spoke about impressionism, but she couldnt speak English well. She pronounced every word slowly, every consonant, and she spent kinda long talking about impressionism. I spent more than 3 minutes, at least 10, talking about 'Turandot'. All of them were limited to around 5 minutes actually. But mine was exceptionally long... but DrKan didnt stop me. After FeiYang's topic on impressionism, too, we all were dismissed. Im glad that its finally over! Now, ive to worry with my aural work, my essay and my assessments. Yes, one more, concert attendance! I havent wrote any concert reviews yet! Im kinda done with the masterclasses already. I asked if i can review a masterclass, which is burnt into VCD, and she allowed me to. Im happy.

Left for Sunshine with YinXuan and LianWei. Fairul headed off to Bugis to meet his friend, so we headed for dinner. I didnt eat much, just a chicken and some bittergourd. After that, we headed for soya. On our way back, we met Rit, he was heading to get some soya. In the lift, we met Rit, he came back with soya. Its either we're slow, or he's fast.

So, i took my aural book, and borrowed the CD from JunRu. I think JunRu is really nice to keep lending me things. Well, thanks so much. After LianWei got his book, we left for LAN.

Played and i walked towards my bus-stop and took bus 57, where i met Jamaludin in the bus. Well, overslept and found myself at Bishan's interchange. I walked all the way over to take bus 162. Im never going to take bus 57 again... unless i change to other buses. Anyway, i just got home, and now im sending YinXuan a Pipa concerto, i hope he'll enjoy it. For a Tuba player, its kinda strange that he would wanna listen to a Pipa concerto. Well, its great!

Im going to head off now to finish up with my work, so sorry, wont be blogging much for today. Anyway, theres nothing much to talk about...

I thought that with my preparation, my oral exam would be smooth, with no gagging and stuttering. Well, who knows? Guess its not that smooth as i thought it'll be.

Turandot

Calming myself with religious music, Buddhism especially. Its called AryaEkadasa-MukhaDharani. Well, its a simple chant, with a smooth melodic line and acoustic features in this CD. I bought it back then, and i lent it to Rit, who only returned my yesterday. Thanks to him, and he read my post where i bitched about him. I hope honesty wont harm forever.

I just came home from Indochine, the forbidden city. Its a pub, and i prefer pubs so much better. I hate noisy places, where people dance in bright and blinking flashes. Then, people throw up and pick up their dates and stuff. Well, not for me, totally not. YinXuan, LianWei, Fairul and i spent $220 there. And to think of it, its considered cheap already! However, it could be cheaper... I'll talk about this later.

I woke up later due to the intense gaming last night. I slept for merely 5 hours. I took a cab down to school, though im not late. So, i didnt get myself any breakfast. I was walking around, still trying to refresh myself of all the things that Christoven taught me yesterday. The year 1s were walking out, and some were giving a sure fail face, and others smiling away. Well, as for me, im kinda sure that im going to be boiled like chicken.

I entered the hall, with MrYap smiling at me. I took a seat with Christoven and behind me were Jobyna and Jwen. Well, i was sure that im going to fail. I borrowed Jason's pen, pencil, ruler and eraser. How useless can i be? I think tomorrow's exam wont require stationery right? I didnt do anything smart or stupid. I took the paper, wrote my name and started wondering what to do with it. I cant fold paper cranes because i dunno how to...

I managed to fill in the blanks for pandiatonicism and quintal and quartal chords confidently. I think thats the only section which i prepared this morning. Though i cant name pieces which has them, for the quartal and quintal chords, im sure Debussy uses them often in his music. Pandiatonicism is just something which is so raw to me. I memorised its meaning before entering the hall... and thats all. I did the first question, the usual 4 part harmony, and i almost cried. I knew i was dead when i didnt find any pivoting point for enharmonic modulation. Its a confirm failure this time round. I scored quite well for my test, and i was very surprised, hoping that i'll do better this time, its indeed a fatter hope. It was by chance, and now... even by luck, i wont be able to make it through this paper.

As for the analysis section, i couldnt figure out the chords at all! I managed to find some common chords such as the five of five of five which proceeds to the five of five, then to five. Its horrible! I hate harmony, and its my final year doing it! I hope that i'll pass it once and for all! I wish not to do it again! Have pity on me! Heaven above, please look down on a pity boy for he wishes not to do harmony ever again in his life.

I headed for lunch after the paper. I was telling others about my modulation-less harmony. They all laughed at me. I knew it, im dead. Christoven was telling me about him finding no pivoting point to pivot back to the home key. Thats funny too. But at least he found somewhere to modulate! I found nothing! I used wierd chords. I tried to embellish my paper with ornaments and thats all... Thats it, dun u laugh at me.

Ate with LianWei, SiHan, Vincent, Christoven, Williana, Sonalia and WeiXiang. At first there was only SiHan, Christoven and i. But well, the more the merrier! After eating, some of us headed to soya stall, while some headed back to school. Sonalia, LianWei, Christoven and i drank soya and we let Sonalia try the dumpling.

Well, nothing else for them, Christoven headed to Novena to get his hair cut. I think he should cut his hair. He should let his hair grow for once, and then let us decide how he should manage his hair. His short hair has been there since the starting of this earth. I think its time to change the hairstyle. But first, we must let that hair grow!

I took Jason's music technology book and revised through the recording chain. I was watching this video on YouTube with LianWei. He laughed like mad. Then, EricWatson came, and chased everybody out of the com lab, because we're having our music technology exams there.

He passed us the paper, and i didnt know when we're starting, because everybody was still flipping through the papers... and EricWatson didnt mention anything about starting. I opened Sibelius, and nobody scolded me... and i arranged the scoring and prepared the file... and still, not scolded. So, i assumed that the exam has already started. I began first with the Sibelius scoring, and i found it rather simple... with many repetition of steps and just a few simple hotkeys to use. But there was something harder, the noteheads. I couldnt change the noteheads of the DrumKit. I think that sucked... and moreover, i accidentally pressed something, which shows the hit point on my score. Its impossible to remove it, and EricWatson couldnt remove it for me either. After finishing on Sibelius as well as Sonar, i filled in the answers to the 2 questions. The first question was simple, its about the difference between a MIDI file and a WAV file. Simple enough? The next question was slightly more troublesome, but as easy as the first, its about the recording chain, which EricWatson gave very direct hints about it coming out for the exam. In fact, he told us that it'll come out!

I completed the paper first, and told EricWatson to store the files into his disk. He was kinda shocked that i finished within an hour or less. He asked if ive completed everything, and he came over to check on my work. Thats when he explained to me about the noteheads, but didnt allow me to change them. And other than that, he tried deleting the hit point, but he couldnt. Anyway, he went around finding a suitable cable for his disk. In his disk, there was his compositions. I saw some and pointed to him, smiling...

I left the com lab first, and surprisingly, so much time for me to go complete me review on 'Turandot'. I walked to the library, and headed into the room. The librarian was telling me that i owe a fine for borrowing the opera. But hello? The opera is not allowed to be borrowed out by students. So, in any case, how isit possible that i got it out of the library? She waved the fine for me, and gave me the earpiece as well as the controllers to the TV and player.

I watched the opera again, because i simply love it! I wanna get the same edition, because its just too good. I wrote the review, but its more like a sypnosis. So, i think i'll have to finish up another review for the submission, as well as a shorter copy for my oral exam tomorrow. I cant wait for the exam, because its going to be fun and wierd... I wonder how it'll be like.

By the way, i'll post the sypnosis which i did later after the post. Its going to be exciting, and for those who are interested, please go read. Its very exciting and its a fantastic opera!

Anyway, after completing my work, i headed back to school. LianWei was asking me out, but i had to rehearse with the dance department. I headed over and took out my Pipa, only to snap the string within the first few minutes of strumming. I tuned it too high, no excuses. I just went through the points and the title of the piece is called 'In place', or something of that sort. Its going to be contradicting, because my playing wont be in place with the dancers. Its my fault mostly... i think. But well, they dun really listen out too. But its my role to wait for them actually. Nevermind, it was uncomfortable, but the rehearsal went fine.

I left, and headed to BK to meet up with SiHan and gang. After stealing fries from SiHan, and talking to Fairul, LianWei and YinXuan, we decided to head over to somewhere to play. Its either a movie or some pubs, but well... u know the final decision was the pub, because i just came back from Indochine. SiHan headed home, while we took bus 147 over to ClarkeQuay. Walked over, sang songs and shouted like girls. We walked for almost an hour, finding a place to settle down. We walked over to Brewerkz too, too bad that SiHan wasnt with us. We were at their doorstep, then we decided not to drink there. We walked back to Hooters, PumpRoom and many others. We walked around... and headed to Indochine. We were at the back, and there wasnt anybody serving us. So, we walked somewhere else. Who knows? We were walking... and we got to the front of Indochine, and we decided to enter then. The lady was kinda wierd... and the guy serving us was totally bullshit. I hate him, and if im his boss, looking at him like that, i'll sack him and fry his balls crispy like KFC.

He was afraid that we couldnt pay, and ordered us to leave a creditcard there or something. So, i left mine there. We ordered for up to $120 and we've no cash. Ive realised that at pubs, its always me paying. I gave them my card, because YinXuan doesnt have enough, same as LianWei, as for Fairul, no need to even mention about coins. We drank, as for me, i ate fingerfood mostly. I chewed on the ice from Fairul's vodka. I almost went drunk! The guy was walking around, looking at us... and i was really irritated. I kept cursing him...

The place was kinda cozy and nice. It has this dark China look. We sat on this huge bed, and with pillows. We were cuddling there and bitching about people. All of us bitched around... and scolded each other and laughed ourselves drunk. I kept asking LianWei to take photos of us. He was like... pissed off. After that, i initiated about ordering another platter. This time, its a most expensive one at $75. It didnt hurt, but i felt happier! We ate and ate and ate...

Was licking our fingers, and drinking beer while bitching around and lying about the huge bed. Soon, i felt this itch and asked if they're feeling this itch in their hair. We were all scratching our heads for a moment.

Well, its time to leave, i paid signed the bill and we headed out. Its around $220, and im paying for the GST, because im so generous. As for them, they'll just pay $27 on top of their own drink. So, its roughly about $50 each.

We walked to the bus-stop, and i took bus 851 home, while LianWei's bus came in time too. YinXuan crossed the road, leaving Fairul alone. Poor thing.

Thats the end of our journey today to Indochine. Its my first time there, and its slightly getting better with places like that, but still... pubs instead of clubs. Chilling out is still a better choice...

Here is the sypnosis of 'Turandot'...

The Opera begins with a heavy introduction of the Brass. An official announces the law of the land: Any man who desires to wed Turandot must first answer her three riddles. If he fails, he will be beheaded. The crowded surges towards the gates of the imperial palace, crying for blood, as the Official announces that the Prince of Persia has failed and is to be beheaded at moonrise.

As the commotion takes place while a blind old man is pushed to the ground. His slave girl, Liu, cries for help and a young man hears her cry and recognizes the old man as his long-lost father, Timur, the deposed king of Tartary. The young prince of Tartary urges his father not to speak his name because he fears the Chinese rulers who have conquered Tartary. Timur then tells his son that of his entire servant; only Liu has remained faithful to him and she is Timur’s only guide.

The executioner enters the stage with a large blade. The music written is highly energetic as the crowd cries for blood while the executioner sharpens his blade. The moon rises and the crowd’s cries for blood turn into silence, Puccini’s music falls immediately into a mysterious quiet and soothing melody. The lighting of the stage is excellent, with a sudden contrast of the red background, into a dark blue night. The faces of the crowd turned from red into pale blue. The theme is written with materials from traditional Chinese music. I am surprised that the melody is taken from a Chinese folk song, ‘Mo Li Hua’.

The doomed Prince of Persia is led before the crowd on his way to execution, firstly led by monks with white lantern. The crowd’s mood turns to mercy, they call on Turandot to spare the Prince. The Prince of Tartary, Calaf, cries out for mercy and curses Turandot for being cruel and cold. The executioner holds his blade against the Prince of Persia as they continue for the execution. Turandot appears behind a cloth at a tower, and with a single gesture, orders the execution to continue.

Calaf, who has never seen Turandot before, falls immediately in love. As he cries out her name with joy, Timur, his father, is shocked. Timur urges his son to desist, and Liu, pleads with him not to attempt the riddles. Wishing to triumph over her beauty, he walks towards the Gong, which was hung in front of the imperial palace. The ministers Ping, Pong and Pang then appear suddenly, warning him that Turandot is unattainable. I personally feel that the ministers are the jester figures in the opera. They mock at Calaf for his blind love towards Turandot. They warn Calaf of the Gong, but he refuses to listen. The lighting and mood changes, as the focus now falls upon the spirits of those who died for Turandot. The hanging skulls from the gates are amazing, as they were there but only lit up during the specific section. Calaf hears them, singing of their love even though they are dead. Calaf is obviously blindly fallen for Turandot, even though the ministers showed Calaf of the head of the Prince of Persia.

Calaf refuses to listen to them and rushes to the Gong. Calling Turandot’s name, he strikes the Gong three times, thereby declaring himself a suitor. Before doing so, Liu cries her heart as she sympathizes for Timur who will lose his only son for the sake of love. She sings with an amazing vocal, crying out her pain and tells Calaf that she can bear no more to see Timur suffer. Calaf remains persistent and stubborn. The crowd comes forth, crying out for Calaf not to attempt the riddles. After the striking of the Gong, everybody cries of horror and scatters off, leaving Liu, Timur and Calaf at the front of the imperial palace.

Ping, Pang and Pong lament their place as ministers, poring over palace documents and presiding over endless rituals in a form of a canon, reciting over one another. Before sunrise, at a pavilion in the imperial palace, they prepare themselves for either a wedding or a funeral. They are tired of counting the rolling heads after every hits of the Gongs, ever riddles, and ever funeral. They consider themselves as the ministers of the execution now, because they are always so busy with the funerals of the foolish madmen who drive themselves into graves because of love.

Ping suddenly longs for his country house in Honan, with its small lake surrounded by bamboo. Pong remembers his grove of forests near Tsiang. As for Pang, he recalls his gardens near Kiu. Music at this section becomes dreamy and with beautiful melodic lines, as slowly the three sings together, sharing fond memories of life away from the palace. Suddenly, they are shaken back to the realities of Turandot’s bloody reign. They continually accompany young men to death and recall their ghastly fate, seeing hopeful ones to their graves.

As the palace trumpet sounds, the ministers ready themselves for another spectacle as they away the entrance of the Emperor.

The crowd sings as they await the entrance of the Emperor. The ministers slowly enter into the courtyard of the palace at sunrise, accompanying them are Chinese acrobats. It is a fascinating view, as the Emperor Altoum, father of Turandot, arrives on his grand throne in his palace. Three times he urges the Prince to withdraw his challenge, and three times the Prince refuses. Turandot enters, and the music lightens as she unveils herself.

She explains, in the aria "In questa reggia", that her ancestress of millennia past, Princess Lo-u Ling, was ravished and murdered by a foreigner, and now out or revenge she has sworn not to let any man possess her. She furiously points her finger at Calaf, and says that Princess Lo-u Ling was dragged away by a man like him. She wants to take revenge out of Calaf of Princess Lo-u Ling’s purity. For trying his fortune, he has to attempt the three riddles, after hearing Turandot claiming that no man shall ever possess her. Turandot discourages Calaf to attempt the riddles, but with determination, the Prince insists on Turandot of giving him the riddles.

With the Emperor’s sacred oath, Turandot has no choice but the pose her first riddle; there hovers in the dark of night a phantom of many colors. It spreads its wings and soars high above the sorrow of human life. All the world calls to it, and all the world implores it. But the phantom vanishes at dawn to be reborn in every heart. And every night it is reborn only to die again each day.

Immediately, with the sudden entry of the strings, Calaf answered Turandot’s riddle with a simple answer; it is hope. Turandot unnerved presents her second riddle; it darts like a flame, but it is not fire. At times it brings delirium. It burns like a fever, a passion. Inertia makes it flag. If you lose heart or die, it grows cold. But if you dream of conquest, it flares up again. Its voice fills you with dread and its glow is like the sunset.

The crowd urges the Prince not to waver. The Prince thinks for a moment before replying, the answer runs in his veins; it is blood. Turandot is shaken, as she furiously shouts for the crowd to be silent, she presents her third riddle; it is ice that sets you afire and it turns that fire to ice. It is both light and dark. In setting you free, it enslaves you. But by enslaving you, it makes you king.

As the Prince thinks, Turandot taunts him, inflicting him with fear. Suddenly, he cries out victory and announces the answer; Turandot!

The crowd cheers for the triumphant Prince, Turandot is horribly shocked and shaken. She throws herself at the Emperor’s feet and pleads him not to leave her to the Prince’s mercy. The Emperor has a sacred oath to fulfill and he insists that Turandot’s duty is to wed the Prince. Still shaken, Turandot yells at the Prince who has won victory over her. She tells him that she will never be his, but the crowd cheers on and claims that she is the Prince’s reward.

Knowing that it is impossible to embrace the proud Turandot forcefully, knowing that she is unwilling, he claims that he would have her burning with love. The crowd admires his bravery and his boldness. Calaf walks towards the Emperor, and challenged Turandot, posing just one riddle for her to figure. As she cries out in anger, the Prince stops her and has a proposal for her; you do not know my name, tell me my name, tell me my name before the break of dawn and at dawn I shall die.

The Emperor declares that he hopes to the call the Prince his son by daybreak. Turandot accepts the riddle, with no choice; she has to find out the Prince’s name before dawn.

In the distance, the Official calls out Turandot’s command; this night, none shall sleep in Peking! The penalty for all will be death if the Prince’s name is not discovered by morning!

The Prince, in the aria "Nessum droma", anticipates his victory. He thinks that his secret is hidden deep in him, and nobody shall ever discover it. He will only reveal his true name if he kisses Turandot, to break the silence and make her smile. However, if he does not reveal his name, the people will perish. Not knowing what cruelty Turandot is capable of, Ping, Pong and Pang warns the Prince of Turandot’s malicious character.

They try offering him anything that he wants, from women to riches, if only he would give up on Turandot, but he refuses. The Prince is selfish and wants only Turandot, and he would not reveal his name. The crowd threatens him with Timur and Liu. They found them both and knows that they are related to the Prince, because they were seen speaking before. The ministers as well as the crowd wish not to die, therefore, they threatens in vain to use tools to force open the sealed lips of Timur and Liu.

Turandot arrives, and orders for Timur to speak the name of the unknown Prince. The Prince feigns ignorance, saying that they know nothing. Liu declares that she alone knows the Prince’s name, bearing the torture that Timur had gone through.

Liu is persistent about revealing the name though she was put into torture by the soldiers. Turandot orders for them to release her, and she asks her who put so much strength in her heart. Liu, answered; princess, it is love! From her sacrificial behavior and the willingness to be tortured for the Prince, it is obviously that Liu is secretly in love with the Prince, Calaf.

Turandot is clearly taken by Liu’s resolve, and demands that Ping tear the Prince’s name from Liu, and he orders her to be tortured. Liu counters Turandot in her aria "Tu che di gel sei cinta", saying that she too shall learn love. Liu daringly points at Turandot and teaches her about love. Having spoken, Liu seizes a dagger from a soldier’s belt and stabs herself.

As she staggers towards the Prince, and falls dead, the crowd screams for her to speak the Prince’s name. Turandot is shaken by Liu’s declaration of love, but stood coldly in a distance. Since Timur is blind, he must be told of Liu’s death. He crawls towards Liu, trying to wake her up in a fatherly manner. Knowing that she is dead, he cries out in anguish. Timur warns that the gods will be offending by such outrage, and the crowd is subdued with shame and fear, begging for the offended spirit to forgive them.

The grieving Timur and the crowd follow Liu’s body as it is carried away. Even Ping, Pang and Pong express remorse and leave Turandot and the Prince alone.

Here, Puccini’s work ends. This opera was left incomplete after his death, but the music was completed later by Franco Alfano.

The Prince tries to convince Turandot to love him. At first, she is disgusted, but after he kisses her, she feels herself turning towards passion. As dawn breaks, the Prince reveals his name; Calaf, son of Timur.

At the courtyard of the palace at dawn, Turandot and Calaf approach the Emperor’s throne. She declares that she knows the Prince’s name; his name is… love! As the crowd cheers, bringing the music into a climax, the Emperor blesses them both and the curtains fall.

I think this is slightly too much for a sypnosis. Its not short and summarised at all! Great!

The Black Spot

Im feeling wierd. Its not love. I think its SiHan's IPod, which made me kinda dizzy during the bus ride. Moreover, for the amount of chocolate and milk i took today, i think im going to throw...

I woke up around noon, and headed down for lunch then to school. I reached school at 4pm. On the bus, i met Rit, and he returned me my CD with the $10 inside. Im surprised.

I walked to the library, and into the room to watch the opera again. "Turandot' is a fantastic opera! I love it so much. Probably its because that its the first ive watched completely. Its probably the relation with China as well... But whateva it is, i love it! The singing and the music is just too beautiful. The captivating parts are so striking that i just wanna cry out loud for the sake of music! My goodness, i was sitting there, staring into Turandot's eyes, and listening to the high notes of Calaf. I love it! I love it!

Anyway, ive managed to do half of the review. Im stuck at the second act. Tomorrow, after my papers, i'll have to rehearse with the dance, and i think i seriously need time for my own studies. I cant allow this to occupy my own time. Though i should be responsible for rehearsing with the dancers, i think i should care more for my own papers, instead of their graduating performance. Look at it this way, im doing it for the sake of others, but who will care for me? I will have to.

After doing the review, Jamaludin called me. I headed down to the theatre, and found the hall to be in total darkness. I saw some lightings on stage, and heard Jamaludin calling me to enter. I found a seat with the help of my handphone's light. Then, i headed outside to wear my nails and to tune the Pipa. I didnt warm up at all, and i have no time to actually. In the end, i went on stage to try out the arrangement as well as the microphone. On that day, it'll be a different microphone, so... no problem.

I played and the dancers danced. Jamaludin wasnt happy, he cut and asked for the dancers to start again because they were marking. What is marking? I asked the dancers, and one of them told me that it means that they are not dancing properly. Cool, marking...

We played through the piece, and i entered early for one part. Other than that, i think im doing fine. Im lazy to play the whole piece with full strength, so i cheated for most of the parts. During the performance, and the recording, i'll try my best to insert my full energy, which shouldnt be more than the energy to brush ur teeth.

After rehearsing, i kept the Pipa and headed to the bus-stop with QingLun. We were talking, and suddenly, a caterpiller interfered. I was telling him about politics in this circle. Well, he doesnt understand what im trying to bring across, but he is right about his own ideas. But u think about it urself, it sounds right in the mind, but... does it feel right? Dun always listen to ur mind, sometimes... i think its more important to listen to the heart. If we work everything out with the mind, what makes us different with computers? Only that they're so much faster. We have emotions, and we should follow them more often than to base our theories with our brain. I know that though its nothing wrong, but things like that causes much chaos in a once peaceful circle that i lived in. In fact, from the day i stepped into this world, the dark spot has already been spreading around. It has caused misery to many, and trouble to others. As for me, it doesnt affect me much, probably its because of my lower confidence now that makes me weak and weaker. I know, in the end, its my problem that im weak, ive nobody to blame. Nobody to blame? Or do i? We're complaining because we're the loser. Its like playing a game, if u lose... u lose, but how do u feel when u lose? When u lose, do u want the winning opponent to mock at u? Or do u wish for the enemies to take advantage of ur misery? I dun think theres a need to. Moreover, some may just leave a game. In this world, how can we leave? We have nowhere else to flee to... Its either we change our route, or we die. So, in the end... whats causing this failure? Isit us, or isit the only rising problem? Who is setting the standard? Isit the black spot, or the common spots?

I alighted the bus, and left QingLun there with just my short conclusion. I walked towards PacificCoffee with an unstable mind. I was pestered by the fact that QingLun managed to bring to me the rejected point of view. I cannot take it, but i listened silently. I think he is right. But, i cannot accept it as the reason for such disturbance in the waters. Well, a political point of view comes from the mind. Mine comes from the heart, which is fragile and not conspicuous in any way as to compare against reality. In this world, everything in court comes from solid black and white statements. Mine is red, it isnt valid...

Met up with Christoven, Audrey, Jwen and Evan. Well, i sat beside them at started calling SiHan. He was complaining that i left him alone. Well, he had lesson and he headed to school because i didnt pick up his call. I dunno why, but i forgotten about him suddenly. Evan was teaching them harmony, and after that, they all headed home. As for Christoven, he promised to teach my what he has learnt later...

We headed for dinner. I wasnt hungry, so i ordered a large coleslaw, which tasted terrible! Im never going to eat that in KFC ever again. Please remind me never to order that again, if i do, please slap me. Maybe not, just tell me not to. Well, i copied some notes over... and a list of terms that might come out for exam. Im kinda shocked that if those words are coming out, im screwed. We talked over dinner, and he was telling me about some people. Well, i cant agree less. I cannot take the attitude anymore! Its irritating, like a fucking irritating bitch diva. If u cant be one, u dun. Divas are generally bitchy, but nice. If ur irritating and a bad diva, its called a bitch or slut. As for Christoven, he is just a diva, WhampoaHilton. As for me, im just the other girl...

Thats not the point! I just cant take the silliness that is driving this social circle mad. People are backstabbing others, while those who have a huge blade stuck behind their backs are not aware of it at all. Those who backstabbed others are stilling fooling around backstabbing more. Those who are bleeding to death are still blind and ignorant that its the one with the knife that is doing the backstabbing! How stupid? How idiotic can people be?

We tossed the topic aside, because its stupid. We headed to MaxBrenner'sChocolateBar, and i got myself the Suckoa, while Christoven ordered Trinidad's white chocolate. Mine came, and its like this incense burning, with a small tiny pot on top. Im supposed to fill it up with this little mug of milk, and this plate of dark chocolate. Its cool, and i think im lucky because that guy gave me alot of chocolate! Others got little, but due to my attractive character, he gave me more. Im sure.

Christoven went through the important notes with me. He taught me the things that he heard from Evan. But the best thing is that, he doesnt even know whether he is sure of the answer! He just told me to follow the progression... without a proper explanation why. He even came up with his own terms. Suspension is known as a drag. U know? Sissy kinda drag. My goodness... i'll never send my children to Christoven's harmony school. MrYap beware, Christoven will start a rival school soon! A revolutionary music school!

SiHan came later, and he blamed us for not calling him along to KFC. Well, we didnt plan to eat there, but we did. Moreover, i persuaded him for so long just now. He didnt wanna come... so too bad! He ordered the same thing as me, but with white chocolate instead. It came with this plate of little white chocolate beads. They looked like dog's chocolate. Cool...

I remembered feeding my dog last time with chocolate. In the end, im feeding myself more than the dog. Fond memories...

Anyway, after talking crap... we left. I headed home on a bus with SiHan. I alighted at his stop, and changed from bus 70 to 76. In the bus, my bladder was exploding. I ran home, and my bladder exploded in time. I released a gush of pee in the toilet.

There are things that i need to blog out, but i need a more private place. Actually, i already got one... its a secret garden... where i plant my secrets and watch them grow. But, should i? If not, then its hard for me to always fool around with words and hidden names...

Well, for those who might guess it right, ur right. If not, then too bad. If ur guessing it wrong, then please check with me, i dun want people going around with misunderstandings and causing more trouble than it already is.

Politics patrol the landscape, and cold wars galumph the surface of this earth. Should we look to the black spot? Or should we sometimes just ignore it and just live on among with the common spots.

Sagacious

Im reading my old poems... and they flash back many memories, which came like coloured water. It flows from high to low, from brightness to darkness... and it brought me into an old realm, where i once lived in. Its very obvious that ive grew out of that well. It has never been so miserable anymore. I enjoyed those times when im so free, checking up on myself, holding on to old memories, and trying to extract words and poems out of them. Its kinda sad that life like is extinct. One day, one day... it'll be back, im sure. Meanwhile, let me just paste some which reflects my previous life...

Sadness is fading away, it must be the passion that im feeling again. Did i wake up from the wrong side of bed? For that my heart is beating faster and stronger than i am. Am i impressed with my own acheivements? For what else have i not done in my life? Did i love once or twice without failing to fall out of it? Or did i deny myself from love into the bottomless pit? Regretted the love i once threw away? I dun think im feeling so. Because my heart is beating stronger, for that my feeling for love is gone no more. Who else in this world shall i fall for? For once again, i commit my own mistakes. And who else shall i turn to this time? Im tired of the givings and tired of the takes.

This poem here kinda reminded me myself of giving and taking. Its never fair, and its never the trust that it should be. What have i done to deserve what i got? I really dunno.

Nevermind about old school stuff. I woke up late today, with SiHan calling me up at around 2pm. It was raining outside, and so... i took a cab down to school. QingLun called me and asked me out for lunch, and so... SiHan wanted to have lunch too, so we 3 ate together.

I entered the cab and the lady looked so much like RenaPhua from behind. She wore this leather jacket, and had the similar hairstyle! I was so shocked at first... but because of the Singaporean accent, i knew it isnt her. Anyway, why would RenaPhua drive a cab? Im joking... Remember? We saw this lady singing at CarltonHotel and she looked like RenaPhua too! Well, its the look. And its funny... Anyway, she was very nice. She told me that its the last day of CNY, and everybody would be stuck at the temple near NAFA, so she took me down to school through Orchard, then down to NAFA, instead of through BukitTimah Road. The fare was like usual, $10, thanks to the rain and the jam.

I went upstairs and looked for them. I was wearing this tight MickeyMouse shirt, and SiHan was laughing at me. I knew it, and i wanted to try it out. Its tight, and its funny... I felt funny, but at least i dared myself to. SiHan was telling me that its really gay, because of the tightness and the high cutting for the sleeves. But actually, its not the cutting, its because i wore that shirt when i was in primary 4, or 5. Its really old, and its from America. The other one from America would be the Pikachu one...

Right...

Had a great meal. We headed back to school, and i watched 'Borat' with SiHan. We were changing computers because the computers are all screwed up. Those against the walls are condemned. They are slow, stupid, retarded and always hanging. We were using earpieces, but with ZhengYi and Evan watching, we turned the volume up. Nobody cared until Alan came in.

Midori joined in after ZhengYi and Evan left. She watched with us from the middle till the end. The nude scene wrestling part was the best! Its really hilarious and disgusting at the same time. Midori was stunned... and she was telling me that she is 22 already and able to watch R21 movies before the scene came. Then, it came, and she was disgusted. SiHan was laughing like a pig. As for me, ive seen that thrice i think, but still... it tickles my bone. We showed that scene to Richard, Sha and others. Its really funny...

Borat is hilarious, and i think its the funniest R21 movie ever. Firstly, its not about the sex, but the racism and the sexism. U must be able to accept such issues as jokes, before watching it. Its kinda blasphemous too... Mostly racism. Its ultimate stupidity.

After watching, SiHan took his Cello and we headed for Esplanade. We took bus 857 there, and was thinking about the fireworks. We bought Cello and Viola strings, and we persuaded Christoven to come out. Christoven asked if we really wanted to see him, because he is ugly. Its like so wierd? Then we replied that its because he is ugly thats why we're his friends. Then, he said, 'ok'.

So, we relaxed at MaxBrenner'sChocolateBar, and waited for Christoven to arrive. I ordered Venezuela dark chocolate, and SiHan, milk chocolate. The bar was running with only 2 guys, serving and cleaning, ordering and cooking. They looked busy. I ordered iced water, and it came... tasting like tap water. I bet its tap water anyway. By the way, the hot chocolate was splendid! Its the best chocolate so far. Well, we've decided to try Fullerton's chocolate buffet one day. I think after exams, its the best time for us to wallow away in spending money and going out and of course, playing! We'll be running naked on the beach! Wait... forget that, maybe something less obscene. Probably shopping.

We shared our hot chocolates, and i think his tasted good, while mine tasted like hot milo with more chocolate. Mine was really thick! I loved it actually...

Mom called, and i told her stupid things.

When Christoven came, we headed off to find ourselves a good space to view the fireworks. We didnt need to squeeze into the crowd, because it was kinda empty at first. The seats were all occupied, and most of the people were watching this outdoor performances by JayZhou wannabes. The fireworks started without any warning, and the drumming in the air started the whole parade of fireworks in the sky.

It exploded like striking drums, and the fireworks sparkled in the sky like glittering fire. It filled the sky, and with the striking black background, the fireworks lit up the sky into morning. Maybe less exaggerated, because i rememered there was a better one back then during NationalDay. Can u imagine? Watching fireworks in the morning? Or against the afternoon hot sun? Its super stupid... u'll go blind.

The fireworks lasted for 5 minutes, which was very long! Its around the timing of 2 stupid pop songs. We were still talking about it, while waiting for the crowd to dwindle.

We didnt know where else to go, so we walked over to McDonalds and got ourselves settled there. We bought 4 large packets of fries, and 20 pieces of nuggets, a huge drink and a hot tea. I told them about 'Turandot' and explained the story to them. Well, see... im practicing what DrKan told us to... to try explaining the story to ur friends. I think its kinda bad, i might need to organise my speech. In fact, there are parts which im not really sure myself... and i think im going to watch the opera again tomorrow. Anyway, the concert attendance portfolio is due next week, not tomorrow. Quite a relief...

After filling up, we all headed home. Christoven headed back to school, and took bus 56. We took bus 70, and i dragged SiHan with his Cello, up to the upper deck. Its kinda difficult, i can understand. We sitted down and started watching LOTR from his IPod. Its kinda cool, and i think i wanna get one. Many of them are paying $20 to get Jeremy, the Viola player, an IPod. How lucky. As for me, i got shit for my birthday.

We decided for a really long time with which section to watch, and by the time, we were already at his stop. We alighted, and he was asking me to go his house. But i dun want... because if i do, i'll stay there till morning already. Its hard to get out, because im lazy to. I stayed at the bus-stop, and he waited with me, then bus 76 came.

Im home now, and i think i need to go shit. Before leaving, let me paste another of my poem here...

Undo this magic, unwind this love. Unseal my freedom, unlock this dove. Untie my shackle, undoubt my faith. Uncoat my comfort, unfold my day. Unload ur weapons, unzip ur pants. Uncover those tears, under those tents. Unveil those secrets, unpack my cards. Until im sorry, then u... unbreak my heart.

Its the sagacity. I know im right.

Dun Say

Im not sure whether im really sinking like the Titanic, or really that everything is rising above me. Either one, its still the same... im going down in some way or another. Ive come to a conclusion, i'll never make it as a Pipa player, because ive just too much to change. I started late, as Samuel said, and ive just some problems which are pulling me down, like YanYu said. Well, cheer on for people out there, and sad for myself to admit, im just playing my Pipa like an ordinary wannabe. Because of this issue, i believe that i'll suffer the cons and hopefully through sympathy, i'll enjoy the pros.

I finished a tin of cashew nuts yesterday. And now, im grabbing something else to munch on. Its this peanut cookie... and well, its the CNY snacks, and it seems to me that nobody touched it. I stole a few bites before CNY, and now its still there, with the top layer not even gone. So, i brought it to my room... and im chewing away while blogging... A cookie for every 2 lines. By the end of this entry, i'll be like SiHan.

Makes sense?

Well, i just wore this really funny shirt, i think im going to wear it out tomorrow. Im going to enjoy this one...

Anyway, i woke up early today. For the first time in many entries, its so rare that i'll say that i woke up early. Usually, its always late, late or later. So, i took bus 76 to Katong. It took me an hour plus, and its just nice! I got there in time, and i rang the doorbell.

Thunder barked, then the gates opened. Thunder is Veltrice's dog. Its a police dog, its huge. Well, theres improvement, and i think she'll need to slow things down. Accuracy first, rather than speed, which his father mentioned to me. Well, true enough, playing music is indeed like everyday's life, with its everyday's theory. MrTan is an engineer, and he taught Veltrice things like how he would with his own job. Thats cool... I gave her a notepad, for me to jot down instructions for her to follow. I taught her how to tune the Pipa, how to count and got to memorise a key today. Her homework would be to find another key for the next lesson. There wouldnt be lesson next week, because im having my exams, and she's having something on too.

Walked out, and took bus 10 towards NUS. I thought that bus 10 would take me hours, but it took me only an hour to get to NUS. In fact, i overslept again! I was at the upper deck, and the driver had to come all the way up to wake me up. He looked so fierce... and he complained and asked me to get down because he has to get off work. I tried my best, and i walked out of the bus and along to the pavement. It was embarrassing, but good enough, the interchange at KentRidge was small. In fact, tiny. There wasnt anybody laughing at me, only some other drivers asking that driver about me. I quickly hopped to a corner. My leg was numb, and there wasnt any support. I stood there, pretending to call somebody, and waiting for the numbness to fade away.

JiaJin told me to take the yellow bus, and i followed his instructions. I got to RafflesHall shortly, and i was like 2 hours early for rehearsal. Actually, only an hour. But well, the rehearsal started really late. Everybody was dragging here and there... and it started at around 3pm. Nevermind, i practiced my Pipa and changed my index nail with my middle finger's. Its kinda strange, but trying to get the hang of it.

Kenny didnt buy me food, and i was starving like a cow. Wait, cows dun starve, they have 4 stomaches! I was famished... We went through the pieces, almost all of it, except the Pipa concerto, and i had to leave. It was fun rehearsing with them, because there isnt a need to stop so often to pause here and there to practice. I love it this way, because as for my standard, im not boasting, i can sightread and practice some hard parts myself. There is no need for me to go through other parts slowly one by one during those normal combine rehearsals. I think today was just nice. I went there, and every musician was there, playing their parts without few mistakes. I loved it... and the atmosphere was there already for me to build on. Some running notes were still stuck... because its too fast to read them. As for others, the jumps are ridiculous. I changed some of the Pipa score, and the Pipa girl was so friendly, she kept smiling. I had fun with u guys, see u on the full rehearsal this coming Saturday.

I'll be so stressed, after performing with NUSCO, ive to rush over for another performance at NAFA. Moreover, i'll be so physically down already... Nevermind that, i headed off first... and found no taxi in sight. I had to walk all the way to YST then UCC, then to the main road. I flagged for so long, then there was 2 that wanted to fetch me. I chose the one that was heading the right direction... and i walked over.

Well, got to school... then Aaron messaged me. Well, i got there in time, and went through the piece with them. Its slightly better this time, but physically its demanding for me. I was beaten flat... and my arms were stiff like logs. I think its the method of playing that is wrong. No need to think actually, im right. I know what is right, and what is wrong, but i just cant get it right for myself. Well, thats why i only can rely myself with teaching. I think i can teach better than i play... Ive to prove myself first. So, i hope Veltrice will listen and do me proud.

After going through the piece, i headed back to level 6 and put the Pipa in the studio. I went to the computer lab to release my stress... and started looking at blogs... surfing on YouTube... and wasting my time, waiting for someone to have dinner with me. I havent had a single meal.

Well, i walked to the bus-stop and took a bus home. I ate downstairs before heading up... and now im so bored, im going to log off. Theres nothing to say, nothing to be said, and nothing that should be said.