Thursday, January 13, 2005

Paroxysm

Im giving up on the Cello Concerto im composing ... Its totally shoddy .

Meadow Evening however is one of the best that ive done so far ... i guess ... People were telling me how great it was or how funny it was ... Sounds like some RPG game music ... ?

I managed to camper through one week of torture , doesnt mean i'll wanna camper through the next ... I want to get out of this cell ! Let me out to play ...

Its really stressing to stay at home doing nothing ... TV programmes nowadays are so boring ... There's nothing to watch even with the SCV cable . All i did was to browse through every channel with the remote on the sofa ...Lugubrious scene eh ?

Mom cooked "ChapChye" , it was eccentric ... ? Gargantuan meal ... ? Think im gonna gain a few more pounds if i were to eat at this rate ... Temptation ... ? Allurement ... ?

Having people calling me a "bear" isnt that nice , is it ? Well , a "bear" means ... A rude , rough or ill-bred fellow . Im definitely not one ... am i ? Well ... a "bear-cat" might be fine . "bear-cat" means ... A person having exceptional power , strength , energy ... Im definitely not one too ... but i dun mind being one . I dunno abt rabbits ... but i do know abt rats , since they go under the same rodent family . A "rat" means ... One who deserts his party ; A renegade ; A turn-coat ; A strike-breaker ; One who works for less than recognised wages .

Ive transcribed some scores for CSCO . So stressing ... I didnt know which to pick ... So i wrote Greensleeves and I Started A Joke . A classic and a pop . Think its gonna turn out real bad ... coz im not sure how its gonna balance . Headache ...

Im real weird , now that i noticed ... or long ago ... Compared to others ... i might be a little alien . Ever wondered how i hugged a pillow to sleep ? How i hold a mouse ? How i eat at Seoul Garden ? How i write ? How i walk ? How i like to push others in front of me ? How i like to sit at the back of others ? How im not comfortable with people walking on the left side ? How i draw everything facing left ? Why i shake my leg ? How anti-social i may be ? Its premeditated ... ? I can preclude all these ... ?

Limbo . Entering it with no conscience . Impute it to me ... ? Precipitous edge , precipice . Vertigo . Striking me as i feel the pull .