Saturday, November 26, 2005

Zealous Vigilance

Maybe im just a jealous little boy , contradicting my own words with my thoughts . Ive no problem with avarice , i can manage that . Its jealousy of maybe ... i dunno . I just feel that im like a pariah . Things must change , and its to how i want it ? Thats kinda selfish ... not my selfless self ... ? Now , the stars have all gone out . Im left with myself and my reflection upon the silver lake ...

Ive written a few poems dating back from a few days ago . Its in my poem blog ... Wheneva im bored , i'll just think of a few lines , and pick out a theme to convey . Well , usually its in riddles to what im talking about . A title speaks the root of the poem , and its meanings should not be neglected .

My Mom is punishing DickShen now , because he broke a mirror . Well , its just a mirror isnt it ? But i dun think anyone can purchase it now in the market . I remembered WeiFeng came my house to stay over once . And he was so bored that i think it cooked his brains . He helped me threw away all the expired stuff in my refrigerator . And when my Mom got home , she got so mad because WeiFeng threw away some 'antiques' as well . Somethings were just meant to be expired , like abalone . But lucky , he didnt throw that away . He threw away my Mom's biscuit box , which were special and valuable now because its not selling in the market anymore . Its meant for her to keep biscuits . Well , the expiry date was meant for the biscuit inside back then . Well , thats for being busybody ... Anyway , thanks WeiFeng . The issue is over anyway ...

My Mom somehow finds trouble herself . Im abit the same i guess ... it runs . I find trouble , not trouble find me . To think of it , ive successed my Mom's characters in me . It runs in the family i guess ... My quick temper , my generosity and my trouble seeking self . Its kinda bad ... but i dun really mind . Im used to it already , maybe thats what keeps my busy .

Im blogging early today , because i dun think there'll be anything else to blog about . I didnt go out , i slept till 5pm today . Jonathan smsed me and asked whether he can go for the camp . Well , of course u can , but its kinda late to tell me now . No more late minute stuffs please ...

Ive just recieved some invitations . Well , to think of it ... my birthday is next week ! And hell no , im not excited about it at all . I dread birthdays ... because it leaves me bad memory . This year , i hope i dun recieve some celebrations from NAFA . Its not that im bad or what ... i just dun really love to celebrate anything of my own . Last year , we had this horrible meal at Suki . Not this year , at least Kuishinbo ... Well , that somebody didnt even wish me a happy birthday last year , and its kinda sad ... I didnt wish him too anyway ... Any special occasion nears , it means something is gonna happen . Well , something bad of course ... If time is right , it'll come . Why must heaven play a trick on me ? Its my day , and i just wish that it rains and cools me down . Let me fall into my slumber and sleep forever ...

I somehow only like to celebrate with some people , because they dun view birthdays as such big events . Well , its once a year though . I'll feel more comfortable ... i dun like surprises . Ive recieved so much surprises throughout my life , and most of it leaves a scar behind . I dun wanna be scarred this time ... leave me alone . I just wanna be a happy little boy .